The Closet

I was asked recently how out of the closet I was. It got me thinking. I have been out of the closet for 15 years. I have had boyfriends and lived with a partner. I remember being afraid and feeling the weight of the closet and the feeling of freedom when I finally did come out. Why does how far in or out of the closet matter in the LGBT community? My conclusion - because the more visible we become (which happens when people are true to themselves and come out of the closet) the freer we are as a person and, in turn a society.

I am so far out of the closet that I don't have enough bread crumbs left to leave a trail back. I am at a point in my life that I just don't care who knows and who doesn't. Being gay is a part of my life, not the only part of my life. Being an uncle, enjoying music and theatre - those are all just parts of my life - and like gay, none of them represent all of me, they are all the parts of me that make me whole. If my desire for equal rights frightens you because I am out of the closet and flaunting my "lifestyle" (I really despise that term) I challenge you to figure out how you flaunt your lifestyle to me every day. If my being out of the closet means you don't want to know me, I challenge you to look in your own. There's clearly something there that's troubling you. It doesn't mean it's necessarily your sexuality either. We all hide pieces of ourselves, but the more we come out of the closet and share them, the more we are free.

The closet represents a time in my life when I was afraid of the future, afraid of myself, afraid of what it would mean if I were gay. Life is what I live now, with the knowledge and my head held high.